I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Found the puke drawer
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
