Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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