Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
After last night, I could never be a politician.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
