i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
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