Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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