I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
