i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
