On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize