she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
accomplished twins. life is a go
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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