I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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