She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
