I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Oh god it's open bar.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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