we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
