all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
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