How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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