I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.