So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't