Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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