I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
