I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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