you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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