Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
