we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize