The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
