My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
