the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize