if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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