he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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