Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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