she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
