Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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