Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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