i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
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