10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
