fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Randomize
