This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
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the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
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80% sure the drag queens carried her home
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.