We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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