the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize