whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
