'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
