it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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