Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
