Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
