How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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