I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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