If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Randomize
