So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
