Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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