i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
