Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
