I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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