break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize